Earlier this year I freaked out.
As a counsellor at the Red Door Health Clinic, I was struggling to work out why I didn’t have more clients.
I’d been warned so many times; “You’re going to be swamped with clients”.
And I got to worrying, in the middle of the night, what if its my name? Premkranti.
That could really turn some people off and I could be slapped with the hippy new age label. And yet my name is me, my essence and foundation. This particular flavour of self doubt is something I have struggled with so many times during my career.
I made a rash, fear driven decision to change the name of my website to the very generic BegaCounselling. When I thought of that name in the weeks that followed, I saw a grey coloured box in my mind, and felt dull.
A wise woman psychologist I shared this dilemma with suggested that if I wasn’t going to step into my name and identity now, when would I? She encouraged me to own my sense of self, embedded in my spiritual name.
The next day I emailed my tech support to change my website name back to Premkranti.com.au, which gives me a tingle and a feeling of expansion.
And client numbers are slowly building.
My own identity crisis is a perfect example of moving from tension to resolution.
Start by talking to someone: sharing your dilemma with a trusted confidential ally is the best way to feel supported and know that you are not alone.
Gain clarity about the origin of your dilemma and how/why it is playing out right now.
Identify clear, tangible strategies to shift old patterns of thinking and behaviour that entangle you and your dilemma.
Now not all dilemmas are as simple as a website name, and I don’t for a second want to negate the serious difficulties many people bring to counselling. Trauma, overwhelming emotions, depression, anxiety and interpersonal conflicts are some of the challenges clients face.
However the steps of the process for understanding and resolution are essentially the same. Sharing the issues with a compassionate listener brings safety and clarity. Clients are encouraged to offer themselves compassion and the understanding that we need to care for the wound they are carrying. Moving forward in the process, clients no longer feel they are wrestling with inner conflict and gain practical strategies to work with and through their issues. Therapy is a non linear process I like to think of as a spiral of change and growth.
Don’t wait till you feel overwhelmed!